Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Randomize
