Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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