I feel like I'm in dance class right now
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
