how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
