Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize