Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
