yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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