why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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