Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
