I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Girls should come with a carfax report
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
