Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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