At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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