It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
