she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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