I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
