i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
