FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
