My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
