Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
