I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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