I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
