No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
