i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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