So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
