did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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