her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
