I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
