I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
