If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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