Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
