Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
