Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
