He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
