i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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