Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
