My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
