My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Randomize
