I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
