You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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