she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
