i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
