I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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