You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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