i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It's Friday. Sex?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
