i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
