This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
