Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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