PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
This baby is an asshole
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
