Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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