So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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