i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
